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IT HAPPENED TO ME: I Met the Love of My Life Because I Read a Memoir About...
Obligatory Couple SelfieI was just a few months shy of graduating from university, and without realizing it I’d turned into a "no" person.“Do you want to go out tonight?” my housemates would ask.“No,”...
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Maxim Is Embracing Feminism with Taylor Swift and Not Screwing it Up
Men’s magazine Maxim is now up to its fourth issue since Kate Lanphear was announced as its first female editor-in-chief last year. Lanphear has made it clear that Maxim is shunning its oiled-up,...
View ArticleI Lasered Out My Uterus After 20 Years of Crippling Cramps and Heavy Periods
My menstrual cycle has been a full-blown fucking nightmare ever since I was 14 years old and started my period on Southwest Airlines traveling from Sacramento to Los Angeles. I was all by myself,...
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A Slightly Ridiculous But Totally Sincere Love Letter to Jeff Goldblum
Dear Jeff Goldblum,I remember the first time I saw your face and my heart skipped a beat. I know what you’re thinking, and you’re wrong. It was not your dewy chest in the forest of Jurassic Park. It...
View ArticleIT HAPPENED TO ME: I Had a Toxic On-Again Off-Again Relationship With a Man...
According to Rav, we met my senior year of college at our mutual friend Lila’s house party off campus. I say "according to him" because I can’t recall it myself. I was blacked out at the time. I know...
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WWJD: Jane Tells You How To Handle An Increasingly Creepy, Little Old Lady
I'd like to preface this "excellent-premise-for-a-horror-movie" question with the following disclaimer: I'm going to blame any egregious errors of judgment in my advice on the fact that the screen of...
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CREEPY CORNER: Borley Rectory -- Hoax or Haunting?
Just saying the name "Borley Rectory" gives me a little chill. Go ahead, say it out loud, "BORLEY RECTORY." Whisper it like Captain Picard and the effect is even more delicious. The idea of Creepy...
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How I Coped with Migraine Associated Vertigo for Three Years
Imagine feeling that drunken-buzzed sensation (minus the alcohol) every day, all day. That’s been my life for the past few years, thanks to Migraine Associated Vertigo (MAV).I’m not exactly sure when I...
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My Family Has Been Scattering My Dad's Ashes All Around the World For Three...
My dad used to say that when he died, he wanted to greet everyone who came to the wake to pay their respects. “I want to be propped up in a comfortable chair, kiddo,” he would say. “I want to be...
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I CHEATED: Cheating On My Boyfriend Was The Best Thing I Ever Did
There’s no way to make this confession without entirely vilifying myself -- and the truth is, there’s no justification in the world for what I did. Cheating is wrong, period. I won’t pretend that my...
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IT HAPPENED TO ME: I Fell 35 Feet Out of a Window Drunk During a College...
I bet you’d never even know it.It has been eight months since I fell out of a third-story window in what I thought would be a normal Saturday night. I have no recollection of that day and the four days...
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Jokes About “Thinking The Olive Garden Is Fancy” Are Classist And Tired
“Hi, it’s me, your friend who never left your hometown and thinks Olive Garden is fancy. Anyway, here’s a racist article.”This joke, in this form, was originally tweeted by Kevin Farzad this past...
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How to Take Care of Your Hands Like A Hand Model (From a Hand Model)
Hand care might not be everyone’s most primary concern – but for me it has become a big part of my life. Working as a hand model here in NYC, I’m expected to have flawless hands and nails. Of course...
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I Finally Stopped Obsessing Over All the Wrong People and It Feels Great
It began with a boy in my youth group. I was 14 and awestruck by him from the moment we first spoke, on an outing to Philadelphia’s bohemian South Street. I was just beginning to figure out, as a...
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Qapla'! Klingon Bloodwine is Finally Mine! (So I Made Heart of Targ Tartare.)
You know that old Klingon proverb "bIQapqu'meH tar DaSop 'e' DatIvnIS" (To really succeed, you must enjoy eating poison)? Well, I like to think that I am very successful by that measure, because if you...
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For Plus-Size Models to Be Mainstreamed, Maybe Fashion Isn't the Way to Go
I'm writing this from inside a pair of size-12 jeans. It's a strange place to be, in the context of marketing. I shop in "straight-size" stores and sections, but I know that most plus-size models are...
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IT HAPPENED TO ME: My Boyfriend's In the Military And I'm Not Moving For Him
Gabe and I after his graduation from Basic Training.My name is Emily, and Gabe, my boyfriend of over a year, is in the army. I’m living in Florida, and he’s been everywhere from South Carolina to...
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UNPOPULAR OPINION: I Don’t Give A Crap Whether Tess Holliday Wears a Size 22...
If you’ve left your cave (or the bridge under which you dwell) in the past couple weeks, you’ll have heard about Tess Holliday, The Size 22 Supermodel. This description has been all over the press...
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I Joined a CrossFit Gym and It Made Me Feel Like an Unpopular High School Kid...
Like everybody else in Los Angeles, I just joined a CrossFit gym. Though I have dabbled in just about every fitness craze to hit the market, I found a home in CrossFit. The high-intensity workouts...
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IT HAPPENED TO ME: I Donated A Kidney To My Husband
We lived “in sin” for 11 ½ years before eloping to Maui.The week before my husband’s kidney transplant, our mechanic tried to faith heal him. As we stood outside the garage, Bob wiped his hands on his...
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