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WWJD: Jane Tells You Whether To Get Rid of Your Two Cats for a Husband
I was working from home on Monday, texting with Emily as we do when we are not together, when I got this potentially horrifying question from one of y'all. I'm curious what you think about how I...
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5 Guided Meditations You Can Buy Right Now To Get You Through The Holidays
Oh you know, just thinking about meditation, LIKE I DO.Want definitive proof that self-help has helped changed my life for the better?Let's look at this picture of me in the fourth grade that someone...
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U R NOT 2 BLAME
A painting of mine I did in 2002 of a man jerking off as seen by a 10-year-old.i met him first in 97on my show –he was promoting 7th heavena show i watchedbecause catherine hicksfrom ryan’s hopethe...
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Missouri Women Will Need "Permission Slips" From Fathers to Get Abortions, If...
It is important to note that this law would, naturally, only affect poor women who were unable to obtain an out-of-state abortion.Watch out, Florida and Mississippi — Missouri is coming for you....
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UNPOPULAR OPINION: I’m a Jewishly-Raised Atheist and I Don’t Mind if You Wish...
Earlier this month, my cousin posted his strongly worded opinion on Facebook:Saying "Merry Christmas" to a stranger is not an act of kindness, it is an act of hostility. The speaker's subtext is, "My...
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Negative-Space Manicures: 4 Cool Ways To Bare a Little Nail Between Your Polish
I’ve never been a fan of nail art. Though it looks cool on Instagram, in real life I always feel silly and end up hiding my fingers whenever I’m out in public. Kudos to you if you can look at...
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4 Things Nobody Tells You About Being Admitted To A Psych Ward
The 1st rule of Mental Hospital Club is nobody feels comfortable asking about Mental Hospital Club.People tend to think that what they see in One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest: padded walls, straight...
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Being Single for the Holidays Fills My Heart with Joy
In the spirit of the season, I will personally forgive anyone who looks pityingly upon the singles fitting themselves awkwardly into family-related conversations at the office or relatives' festive...
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The 10 Christmas Songs That Reduce Me To Actual Tears Every Single Freaking Year
I swear I’m not a big crier. But catch me around Christmas and you would think that I’m an emotional train wreck. There’s just something about the music that turns me into a big sobbing mess of a human...
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Really Freakin' Weird Taxi Experiences Have Become the Norm for Me
Hey, remember that time my cab driver asked me the difference between rape and sodomy? Good times. (No, really -- it turned out to be a pretty tender moment.) Considering how infrequently I've been...
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IT HAPPENED TO ME: I Asked Santa for a Boyfriend and Tinder Delivered
When I sat on Santa's lap, I had completely forgotten I was supposed to tell him what I wanted as a present.“Surely, there must be something,” he said.I didn’t say anything. I looked at the line of...
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The Christmas Cat That Worked Better Than Xanax
2014 can be labeled as "the year of..." many things. The year I spent recovering from a super-shitty depressive episode The year I successfully ate a clean diet for 40 days, and ran my first 5k. The...
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SCIENCE SAYS: Nagging Your Family Members To Lose Weight Has The Opposite Effect
I'm overweight. I'm overweight by New York standards, Hollywood standards and medical standards. I'm not "death fat" (Lesley's satirical term for morbid obesity), and I don't wear plus-size clothing...
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What's The Most Thoughtful Gift You've Ever Received?
"I hate random crap," I said to a friend's boyfriend last night while we hung out drinking cocktails (them) and fancy fake drinks (me). "So I try not to give it."Every holiday season, no matter what...
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UNPOPULAR OPINION: These YouTube Authors are Ruining the Publishing Industry
If I had a dollar for every time I’ve read an article about Zoella’s newest book, "Girl Online," I still wouldn’t have as much money as she made during its first week on sale. She’s slated to make more...
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The 5 Best Beauty and Style Perks of Being Home for the Holidays
Greetings from the frozen tundra! (That’s Emma-speak for northern Michigan.) I made it here just as the 87th blizzard of the year started, and comfy-cozy am I sitting in a Lazyboy next to a...
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IT HAPPENED TO ME: My Boyfriend and I Live With His Parents
His childhood room aka "our room."I scurry out of the shower in just a thong and T-shirt before I get caught. I'm halfway down the hallway to my boyfriend, Brett's room, when his father turns the...
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I Judge Relationships By Presents
I judge relationships by presents.I know I shouldn’t and I know that people have different ways of expressing their affection.I’ve read "The Five Love Languages" and know that people express themselves...
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The Very Last Open Thread of This Very Year
A photograph from our old office at the beginning of 2014 (or so) to remember where I came from this year and to get me excited about where I'm going (aka I don't have another photo on me and want to...
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Social Anxiety Sucks But I Like Having Parties Anyway
Morton the Squid chills after everyone has gone home: exhausted.Friday morning, I texted Ed: I was freaking out and just needed someone to remind me that everything was going to go smoothly. I'm always...
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